SOLO because YOLO
What are the first few words that come to your mind when you think about a solo trip? Fun, wild, amazing? Now think of some words for a girl’s solo trip…
A girl’s solo trip is seen as a brave thing to do by some while unwise and unnecessary by others.
“Why alone? Don’t you have any good friends?”
“Oh, wow! Solo? That’s very courageous of you!”
“You can wait for a few years and then go with your husband.”
“Would you be able to manage this whole weird solo thing?”
“What’s the need? Do you have any reasons to go?”
“Great, I always wanted to go on a solo trip…”
“What major happened in your life that you want to do this?”
Interestingly, the reason and the origin behind both the thoughts remain almost similar- a solo trip when there are so many apprehensions and fear associated with it? Why and how!
The origin of these apprehensions is the ‘unsafety’ and ‘uncertainty’ related to any such trips. Unsafe, because we don’t have many good people around, right? They can take advantage of you or maybe lead you in the worst direction. A girl alone roaming around can also be taken as a signal that her conscience may not be strong and can be easily misused. Or worst, she might be ‘available’ to the world. Uncertain because what is the certainty that you (girls) can complete this trip without any mishap? How certain are you that you will enjoy this trip alone or would be able to interact with new people?
Change one thing, change everything
I always wanted to go alone and roam around, however, these thoughts held me back. The thought that I am not ready for this adventure (because there are so many qualms about it) always stopped me from even imagining what a solo trip could be. I always tried to remove the ‘un’ factor from unsafe, uncertain, and unexpected. However, little did I know the ‘un’ itself makes the feeling worthwhile. It gives you enough courage to take risks, come out of your comfort zone and shush the dubious conceptions that shroud you.
What in life is certain? Is this life even certain? Why do we fear uncertainty but always complain about monotonicity! Life was never meant to be led monotonously. Let your thoughts flow and let your eyes twinkle with your wild imaginations. There is no way we can make everything certain in this life. I believe what we can’t change, we should not control it because every effort towards it might make us sour. The whole process will restrict us when all we want to do is let go of all restrictions and taste freedom, every day.
Talking about interacting with others- the necessity to talk to someone just to feel the part of the surrounding is so real but I feel is so less discussed or talked about. For me, one problem was also that I usually don’t get involved much and these trips ‘should’ make you feel open to people because that’s a new learning. But this compulsion to make friends everywhere and be the sunshine wherever you go adds up to the pressure I feel. Enjoy the bonfire and let that social anxiety burn in that flame. You can just be in that place with yourself and not interact with anyone. It is then when conversations are organic and not intentional. It is then when you become a part of an interesting confab unknowingly and effortlessly. It is then that you respect the space of others and the discussions all the while. It is then those chats become better than silence.
A journey of a thousand miles begins with a single step
Often our judgments and imaginations become bigger than the desire to experience this quest. I fathomed my fear was again crippling me from living the desire. For me, freedom has always been the lack of fear. This is the only definition I believe in. I fear a lot of things. I mean trust me; the list is big. But you know, it’s always good to erase one thing at a time because always remember, the journey should be pleasant. So, this was the right time for an unplanned, unimagined, uncertain solo trip. I diluted the ‘unsafe’ thing from my mind by feeding in some good thoughts, and most importantly, I trusted myself, the entire time. Trust yourself, trust your intentions, trust your conscience, trust your journey; and that’s it! The journey becomes pleasant. 😊
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I am on a solo trip and I am enjoying every bit of it. Be it carrying the luggage and changing the buses or staying in a room with total strangers or be it sipping a cup of tea and talking to myself. Today, I said, “I am proud of you” to myself! I have never said this before and believe me I have won a fair share of accomplishments in my life. Maybe my heart was waiting for this, and for so long! My friends, know what makes you proud and do that. It can be about cooking the best meal for yourself or helping a friend in need. It can be about having lunch alone in your favorite café or about meeting new people and immersing in their stories. It can be anything! The smallest thing you wished or desired or the biggest dream that doesn’t let you sleep. Do that, in this short life because you feel happy at that moment, you feel complete. The anger and dissatisfaction convert into appreciativeness and happiness. The void that we all carry in ourselves fills with gratitude.
Honestly, the purpose of this trip was to challenge me and erase at least one thing from my ‘fear list’. However, only after coming here, did I realize that the purpose was just to ‘experience’ this. There is no list, no challenge, no proving business. It is always about you. It has always been about you.
So, my friends, don’t give any second thoughts, and pack that rucksack that you got or is on your amazon wishlist and go wherever you want to. There is bad in this world, but there will always be good to balance it out. Trust me, solo trips are a great way to meet yourself and new, unlike-minded people. The experience is wholesome and empowering.
Since I have used uncertainty and unsafe a lot in my blogs, I feel a little obliged now to actually write on these trepidations and share how these preconceived lines blurred for me and made a mark on this new journey. 😊
I will be glad to hear your solo trip stories as I learned that this is the best way to know each other and become friends from strangers effortlessly!
Inspirational 💫
Thank you! <3